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This last fact has always kind of perplexed me, because I’d consider myself a fairly decent flirt with people for whom I have romantic interest.

Having been a pretty successful bartender in my early 20s, flirting was something I had to learn in order to woo a few extra dollars from my customers for the martini I just shook them.

I question pretty much every text message I ever send a member of the opposite sex.

And, if I really like a person, I 100 percent lose the ability to flirt.

If I’m afraid to take that step, and in my mind, that really cuts into my opportunities to meet someone.

That said, I’m trying to reframe my Instagram flirting, instead considering it more like practice for the main event.

I decided to break out of the box life had put me in. At least in my personal life, where I was feeling the most letdown, where I was not an equal opportunity player.

But I am done fitting in with the stereotype of what society demands of women. In the end, you don’t get your due at any of the multiple jobs you do every day but, hey, there’s always Women’s Day, where you can pretend you are super human.

They told me of other women they had met through the app. How a couple in a marriage — through years of love, conflict, comfort, raising children and wanting different things from life — begin to stop seeing each other. But it’s not easy, as human emotions cannot always be transactional.Housewives, head honchos of corporate houses, entrepreneurs, marathon runners, et al. This, I realised, was normal and happened to everyone. You could argue that I could put all this effort and energy to mend my marriage.Many refuse to acknowledge it because we are raised to believe in the happily ever after. What the men were complaining of their wives, maybe I was doing the same to my spouse? But after a decade of being married I know that the fundamental problems between my husband and I will never fade.I charm the absolute pants off of family members of significant others, and pretty much know exactly what to say to win a stranger over.But plop a man with tattoos and a strong jawline in front of me, and I go from “cute and flirty” to “bitchy and/or completely mute.” Recently, I had a conversation with a friend in which she mentioned the magic of Instagram DM for flirting.

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