Dating the divorced guy

"Workloads go up and down, schedules can shift, and you want some way to take that into account." If you're a dad, divorce doesn't change that.

Your child still needs you as a father, not as a visitor.

Divorced men are twice as likely to commit suicide as married men.

Divorced men are also more prone to alcohol problems, so be careful of starting down that road.

Because when it comes to having a relationship with a man who has kids, you’ll need to follow a whole new set of guidelines.

"Tell the woman you've just been through a tough divorce and that you're not ready for a committed relationship," he suggests.

"Acknowledge that it is not the right time for that." After a divorce, it's easy for guys to let themselves become isolated, especially if the ex gets custody of the kids. It can worsen feelings of depression, guilt, and loneliness, a potentially dangerous mix.

"That should be the most important thing from the man's point of view: His child wants him and his child needs him," Finley says.

"Maintaining the relationship is important for your child's developmental outcome: social, emotional, and educational." Finley warns against becoming what he calls a "Disneyland dad," who acts as if his role is to show up on weekends and show the kids a good time.

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